Thursday, June 30, 2011

Best cowboy pick up line


Best cowboy pick up line.......

A cowboy walks into a bar and  takes a seat next to a very attractive woman.  
He gives her  a quick glance then causally looks at his watch for a  moment.
The woman notices this and asks, 'Is your date  running late?'
'No', he replies, 'I just got this state-of-the-art watch, and I was just testing it...'
The intrigued  woman says, 'A state-of-the-art watch?  'What's so special  about it?'
The cowboy explains, 'It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically.'
The lady says , 'What's it telling you now?'
"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties.'
The woman giggles and replies 'Well it must be  broken because I am wearing panties!'
The cowboy smiles, taps his watch and says, 'Damn thing's an hour fast .'



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Desperate for Water!


Desperate for Water!


A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand, selling ties. 
The Taliban asked, "Do you have water?" 
The Jewish man replied, "I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $5." 
The Taliban shouted, "Idiot! I do not need an over-priced tie. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!" 
"OK," said the old Jewish man, "It does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant. It has all the ice cold water you need. Shalom." 
Cursing, the Taliban staggered away over the hill. Several hours later he staggered back, almost dead and said, "Your *#!!#* brother won't let me in without a tie!" 



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